Writing a death notification is often one of the most difficult tasks someone has to undertake after losing a loved one. It’s an announcement that no one ever wants to make, but it serves the practical purpose of informing the deceased person’s wider community about their passing. A well-written death notice accomplishes this while also honoring the person’s life and legacy. Here are some tips on how to write a meaningful, sensitive death notification.
What is the purpose of a death notification?
A death notification, also sometimes called an obituary or death announcement, has several purposes:
- To formally announce someone’s death to the public
- To provide details about the person’s life for those who may not have known them well
- To announce funeral or memorial service details
- To thank people for their support, condolences, and remembrances
- To allow friends and community to celebrate the person’s life and share memories
- To inform about where memorial donations may be made in the person’s honor
By serving these functions, a death notice helps loved ones grieve and gain closure, while also allowing the community to pay respects and celebrate someone’s life and legacy.
Where should you publish a death notification?
The most common places to publish a death notification include:
- Local or major newspapers – Newspapers often have death notice submission forms on their websites. Notices in print newspapers and/or their online archives create a permanent record.
- Funeral home websites – Funeral homes often provide templates and will share notices on their websites.
- Special online obituary sites – Websites like Legacy.com provide permanent archiving and easy sharing with social networks.
- Organization newsletters and bulletins – If the deceased person was active in any organizations or alumni groups, their communications are great options.
- Government registry – Some local governments maintain public death records that loved ones can submit notices to.
- Social media – Sharing a notice or memorial post on the deceased person’s social media accounts allows broad sharing with their networks.
It’s often advised to publish in multiple forums to notify different parts of the community.
What information should you include in a death notification?
The specific contents can vary depending on your preferences and the publication requirements, but some standard items to include are:
- Full legal name of deceased
- Birth and death dates
- Location of death
- Cause of death (optional)
- Biographical information like education, career, military service, memberships, hobbies, and interests
- Immediate family members’ names
- Time and location of funeral or memorial service
- Where to send flowers, donations, or condolences
- Appreciation for condolences and support
Some people also like to include a poem, lyric, or special quote that memorialized the deceased. This is optional but can add meaningful personalization.
How should you structure and write the notice content?
The notice should follow a clear organization with key sections:
Opening statement – Begin with a simple, direct statement identifying the deceased, their age, location of death, and date of passing. For example:
“John Smith, 81, lifelong resident of Springfield, IL, passed away on Tuesday, January 5, 2023, in Springfield.”
Biographical content – Provide key facts, achievements, and personal details that capture the essence of the deceased in 2-3 paragraphs. Focus on their core relationships, passions, values, and community ties.
Service details – Note the funeral/memorial date, time, and address here. Include any reception or burial plans.
Survivors list – List immediate family members, starting with the spouse/partner and then children in birth order. You may include locations or familial roles.
Appreciation – Thank readers for their condolences, prayers, flowers, donations, or any other gestures in this brief paragraph.
Memorial details – Provide charities for donations made in their honor or where to send flowers, cards, food, etc.
Section | Example Wording |
---|---|
Opening Statement | Jane Doe, beloved mother and grandmother, passed away peacefully on Tuesday, September 5, 2023 in Springfield, IL. She was 75. |
Biographical Content | Jane was born in Chicago in 1948 and moved to Springfield after college. She worked as an elementary school teacher for over 30 years. Jane loved gardening, cooking, and spending time with her book club friends. She was an active member of Local Church. Most of all, she cherished time with her children and grandchildren. |
Service Details | A memorial service will be held on Saturday, September 10 at 10:00 am at Local Church in Springfield. A reception will follow. |
Survivors List | Jane is survived by her loving husband John Doe; daughters Anne Smith of Springfield and Mary Jones (Tom) of Chicago; sister Helen Johnson of St. Louis; and 5 grandchildren. |
Appreciation | The family appreciates your condolences, prayers, and memories of Jane during this difficult time. |
Memorial Details | In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Local Animal Shelter in Jane’s memory. |
How should you set the tone and voice?
The tone should be formal but sincere. This is not a time for irony, humor or colorful language. Sincerity, respect and tenderness should come through.
Use a compassionate, direct voice to convey the facts. Avoid excessive adjectives or embellishment, but do include descriptive details that humanize the deceased. First person (“I”/”we”) can be used as appropriate.
Overall, focus on honoring the deceased with warmth and honesty. This notice shares their story and legacy.
What mistakes should you avoid?
Some common pitfalls to avoid:
- Providing incorrect or inconsistent personal details
- Exaggerating achievements or relationships
- Including irrelevant, odd anecdotes or trivial memories
- Using clichéd or stilted language like “passed away,” “called to glory,” etc.
- Listing accomplishments without personal touches
- Making it too long with excess details or winding narrative
- Letting emotions make it too casual, gushing, or ironic in tone
Stick to sincere, concise language inline with the solemn nature of the notice. Verify all key facts. Include personal touches to create a meaningful remembrance.
How long should a death notification be?
Death notices are generally quite brief, between 150-300 words or about 2-6 paragraphs.
Very short notices may contain just the basics like the name, age, date, place of death, and service times.
Most standard death notices range from 150-250 words. This provides enough space for a 1-3 paragraph biography, key survivor names, funeral details, and a note of thanks or memorial donations statement.
Only in special cases, like public figures, are lengthier 500+ word notices needed to fully summarize their life and achievements. Avoid excessive length or meandering narratives. Focused brevity is best for these solemn notices.
Should you include a photo?
Photos are optional but can add meaning when paired with a death notice. Choose a flattering, appropriate headshot or nice family photo. Be sure to get permission from the owner if using a professional or copyrighted photo.
Some publications may have formatting guidelines regarding images, like requiring professionally printed or digital photos of certain specifications. Check requirements before submitting an image with a notice.
If including a photo electronically, attach it as a JPG, PNG or other standard image file format. Include a caption identifying the person and other relevant photo details.
Here is an example of embedding a photo with a caption in a death notice:
John Smith, 1962 – 2023. Photo taken in 2018.
How should you handle cause of death?
Whether or not to include the cause of death is a personal decision. There are a few factors to consider:
- Is the cause of death already public information?
- Could revealing it bring additional grief or social stigmas?
- Does it help tell the deceased’s story?
- Is it appropriate to message you want to convey?
In many standard death notices, the cause of death is omitted entirely or very generically stated like “after a long illness.” This maintains privacy and decorum.
However, if the deceased openly battled a particular disease or cause of death relates to their public life, including it can help convey their struggle and story. Use sensitivity – focus on their life rather than medical specifics.
You can also acknowledge a cause of death more indirectly by naming relevant organizations for memorial donations in their honor.
There are benefits on both sides – including a cause may erase stigma and spawn awareness, but excluding may be more prudent or respectful. Evaluate your individual situation thoughtfully.
How should you handle the deceased’s social media profiles?
The death of a friend or loved one generates an outpouring of social media tributes and condolences. As next of kin, you may want to post a death announcement on their profiles as well. Here are some best practices around handling a deceased person’s social media presence:
- Memorialize the account if possible – Facebook offers a feature to memorialize pages so they become a static tribute.
- Update profile photos with meaningful images or memorial graphics
- Pin a death notification post featuring service details at the top of timelines
- Manage comment moderation and friend requests going forward
- Consider creating an obituary tab with photo albums, videos, memories
- Respond to messages, follow any legacy wishes stated
The loss of a social media presence can compound grief, so use settings thoughtfully to create living tributes. Be transparent that you are posting on their behalf. Coordinate memorial management with family.
How should you handle announcements via email or personal contacts?
In addition to formal published notices, you may need to notify extended contacts personally about the loss. This is challenging but important, especially for older adults with offline networks.
Here are some tips for announcing a death via email:
- Send from your own email, or the deceased’s email if you have access
- Use clear subject line like “Notice of Jane Doe’s Passing”
- Include key details – full name, age, date, place of death, service info
- Share a brief life summary and achievements
- Attach formal obituary if available
- Provide guidance on condolences, donations, flowers, etc.
- Convey other wishes like privacy, food assistance, childcare
- Adapt message for different groups like close friends vs work contacts
Handwritten notes or phone calls may be better for select intimate contacts. Prioritize notifying those who may not see formal notices.
What are tips for writing your own death notification to pre-plan?
Pre-planning one’s own death notification provides peace of mind and helpful guidance to loved ones. Some tips:
- Outline key biographical details, memories, accomplishments
- Provide instructions for service, burial, charities
- Specify how to handle your social media, business profiles
- List key contacts to inform
- Share meaningful photos, quotes, poems to include
- State preferences on cause of death, autopsy, organ donation
- Relay other end-of-life wishes
- Save your draft in a secure place accessible to family
While death is difficult to fathom, pre-planning removes stresses and offers you a legacy voice in your notice. Be as thorough and transparent as possible.
Conclusion
Writing a death notification is a solemn, emotional task that also carries great responsibility. By following the steps here thoughtfully, you can craft a meaningful notice that honors your loved one’s life and legacy. Focus on accuracy, sensitivity, concision and clarity as you share their story. With care and compassion, your notification will provide comfort, closure and inspiration to all who knew them.